Minister

Minister jokes

Aclu

    • Why did the ACLU block the cellphone number of a Christian nationalist minister? Because the Christian nationalist had a virus on his cellphone and kept calling the ACLU because he wanted to join the ACLU because he wanted to become a card-carrying member of the ACLU.

  • 1

    • Man

    • How do you keep a homophobic heterosexual man that is a minister and a Christian nationalist with blond hair in suspense?

    Wait until Christmas to take away his church's tax-exempt status or he will call the ACLU.

  • 0

    • IKEA

    • The CEO of IKEA was just elected Prime Minister in Sweden.

    He should have his cabinet together by the end of the weekend.

  • 0

    • Roman Catholic

    • Why do Roman Catholics always call their minister father?

    because Roman Catholic men between 18-29 years old received a free anonymous blowjob inside the confessional booth at the glory hole.

  • 0
    • Minister memes

    Religion

    • What does the Bartles and Jaymes wine cooler television ad have in common with ministers who are white Christian nationalists?

    They both thank you for your financial support.

  • 1

    • Christian

    • Why did a minister who is a Christian nationalist and a bisexual man give anonymous blowjobs to physically handicapped gay men under the handicapped stalls inside the men's restrooms at a rest area?

    He wanted to eat footlong hotdogs for lunch at the rest area, but he wanted a sample first (taster).

  • 0

    • Firefighter

    • Did you know that former Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison was a firefighter? He got fired for trying to fight a fire with tickets to Hawaii.

  • 1

    • Couple

    • A young couple gets banned from church.

    There were three couples, one elderly, one middle-aged, and one newlywed, that wanted to join a church. So the minister tells them that in order to be members they must abstain from sex for two whole weeks.

    After two weeks, the minister asks the elderly couple if they had abstained. "Yes, no problem!" So the minister welcomes them to the church.

    Then he asks the middle-aged couple the same question, "Well, after one week, the husband had to sleep on the couch, but we made it!" So the minister welcomes them to the church.

    Then the minister asks the newlywed couple if they had abstained from sex for two weeks.

    "We were unable to abstain. On the third day, my wife dropped a can of corn and when she bent over to pick it up, LUST and PASSION overcame me! I took her right there."

    "I'm sorry," the minister says, "but you are both banned from this church!"

    "We understand," says the husband, "We were banned from the grocery store, too."

  • 1

    • Priest

    • Why are priests called father? Because it's not appropriate to call them daddy. Also because it is embarrassing.

    Religion

    • There's only one reason our Education Minister is standing by this curriculum.

    In her religion, you NEVER pull out.

  • 0

    • Prison

    • Our soon to be ex-Justice Minister is trying to distract us from his own misconduct charges by funding advocates for crime victims.

    He should fund proctologists too because he'll likely need both after prison.

    Ideology

    • Is it far enough? We publish interviews with people who know a lot about real wars.

    Peace: On one case, that's true, but violence is the slogan for it.

    Socialism: Yes, morning and evening. So the Sorce Streftator's work must be stopped!

    Maoist: Yes, I like Walken Engspert.

    Anarchist: Claire, this is why we don't need democracy, I'm Das Zoe Melsen.

    Capitalism: Yes, but the truth is that he is ignorant and cannot be considered as an old leader, but as an employee.

    Governor: Yes, but a strong left should be as strong as Minister Janomen Vardan or Director Januso Gavrelic.

    Patriots: Are there simple megalithic laws?

  • 0

    • Priest

    • A priest, a minister, a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar.

    The bartender looks at them and says, "Is this a joke?"