Superhero jokes
What do orphans like to watch? Spider-Man: Homecoming.
Megamind.
I am Thor.
And next year, I will be five.
What is Spiderman's favorite rice?
Uncle Ben's.
What superhero will orphans never understand?
Homelander.
Chris Hemsworth is Australian, and Thor is from space. Does that make him an Australien?
My son told me he wanted to be Batman when he grows up. That little shit wants to be gunned down in an alley.
Why'd the alternate universe Spider-Man do so well on his driving test? He's an excellent parallel Parker.
What did Jessiey do?
Jump and make a explosionnnnnnnn, heyyyy gas!
A failed marriage is like an Avengers movie.
First someone snaps, then half your stuff is gone.
What do you call a group of Alabama superheroes?
The Incredibles.
Your mum is so fat, when she roleplayed Wonder Woman, she couldn't fit in the invisible jet.
What’s the difference between Batman and the Black Panther?
Batman returns.
How does Skeletor feel after He-Man beats him up?
Skelesore.
Yo mama is so ugly, she makes the Flash stop dead in his tracks.
Cause they about to taste my Morbius! I got that acrimonious odious Cause the bats are copious My blood flow is harmonious Bout to act felonious You know they hating us And we getting treasonous Woo when they get bit with the Morbius! I got that acrimonious odious Cause the bats are copious My blood flow is harmonious Bout to act felonious You know they hating us And we getting treasonous Woo when they get bit with the (Morbius) (Morbius) (Morbius) (Morbius) (Morbius) Morbius (His name is Dr. Michael Morbius)
Is that a bird? Is that a plane? It's a plane!
What is Mr. Incredible's biggest fan now called? Down Syndrome :)
Captain America is a 106-year-old virgin.
What do you call a child version of Batman?
The Raped Crusader.