Superhero jokes
What did one orphan say to another orphan?
"Get in the batmobile, Robin!"
Kid finds genie lamp, wishes to be Batman.
Genie: You're now an orphan.
Robin: "The car's not working."
Batman: "Did you check the battery?"
Robin: "What's a tery?"
I need more webs and I need more supplies for more webs, how do I make them? With spiders!
If someone with a lisp dropped a hammer on their foot, would they be Thor?
A failed marriage is like an Avengers movie.
First someone snaps, then half your stuff is gone.
Q: What’s the difference between Black Panther and Batman?
A: Batman “returns.”
It's all fun and games until someone fails at becoming Superman.
That awkward moment you try to relate to Batman by killing your parents.
Me imagining how Batman's hairline looks like.
Nobody: Me: His hairline kinda do look like a Batman symbol.
What do you call a group of redneck superheroes? The Inbredibles.
What is a superhero’s 🦸♀️ favorite drink?
Fruit punch!
Imagine if Batman had a family reunion!
Superman and Flash were in the living room pounding back a few beers. Flash says to Superman, "I bet you can fly into Wonder Woman's bedroom and get the best pussy of your life." So he does it. When he goes back to Flash, Superman says, "Man, that was great, but my ass kinda burns."
What is Batman's favorite food?
Justice.
Why would an orphan be a good Spider-Man?
Because his parents will be far from home.
What superhero will orphans never understand?
Homelander.
Yo mama so fat it took Thanos 2 snaps.
What is Spiderman's favorite rice?
Uncle Ben's.
Kid: "I wish I could be like Batman!" Genie: "Wish granted!" When the kid gets home, both of his parents are dead.