Superhero Jokes

Weed: *gets hit my his own power*

Cop: Wait, shouldn’t you be resistant to your own element?

Weed: Are you resistant to bullets when you shoot a gun?

(From Unknown Superheroes 11 by I am Mobo

To you, Iron Man may seem cool or awesome, but to me, he is pretty ironic.

My boss said “dress for the job you want, not for the job you have.” So I went in as Batman.

a man was forced off the Eiffel Tower, but he flew back up. The executionares asked "how'd you do that?" he said, " I had magic chips, here, take some"they eat them, jump off and die.

He asks for more chips, and the guy says "you're a real a**hole when you're drunk superman."

Robin asks Batman what are you getting your parents for Christmas Batman gets mad slaps Robin and runs off crying

now you know why Batman beyond was born when Bruce died cause of death: suicide

Super true

A close-up photo of a man with a bald head and goatee. The text overlay reads: "Thanos with human skin looks like the guy from Pawn Stars."

what do you call cap and spider-man? SPIDER-AMERICA!!!!!!!!

What dose the orphan have in common with Batman they both lost their parents.

Which brand of underwear does Thor is wearing ?- Asgard.

Why does Batman only wear black?

Because he's emo!

What is an orphan's role model?

Batman.

Superman was flying one day when he saw Wonder Woman laying by the pool completely naked. He thought, "I can fuck her so fast she wouldn't even know what happened." So he then flew down to the pool and did fuck her.

Wonder Woman stood up and said, "What was that?" The Invisible Man said, "I don't know, but my asshole stinks!"

How did Peter Parker get caught as Spider Man? Well, he weaved a really tangled web and Aunt May saw it.

Question: How was Covid-19 born?

Answer: Someone fucked Batman! 😂

One night I was sitting on my bed in my room, minding my own business. It was pretty late, around 10 PM. The glow of my laptop screen was the only light in the room. I heard a noise coming from behind me. It sounded like the door was opening, but there was no one else in the house. I turned around and found Mr. Incredible standing in my doorway, a stern look on his face. He walked over to me, slowly and dramatically. Then he leaned over and pointed his finger at my face, only about two inches away now. I was frozen with my back against the wall. Then, Mr. Incredible said something I would never forget: "Stop pirating video games." Ever since that day, I have never gone on a pirating website and have paid legally for my video games. True story.

What do you call a woman with magical abilities and an android? Wanda Maximoff and Vision!!!!! Or.... Scarlet Witch and Vision!!!!!!! This joke was added to celebrate and honour Marvel Studios new series: WandaVision!!!!!!

Batman: Arkham Knight, developed by Rocksteady Studios, is the final installment in the critically acclaimed Batman: Arkham series. Released in 2015, the game is renowned for its immersive gameplay, compelling narrative, and stunning visual design, offering players an unparalleled experience of stepping into the shoes of the iconic Dark Knight. The game's narrative is one of its standout features. Set one year after the events of Batman: Arkham City, the story sees Batman facing the ultimate threat against Gotham City. The Scarecrow returns to unite an impressive roster of super villains, including Penguin, Two-Face, and Harley Quinn, with a singular goal - to destroy Batman forever. The narrative is dark, intense, and filled with surprising twists, keeping players engaged till the very end. In terms of gameplay, Batman: Arkham Knight introduces the Batmobile as a drivable vehicle, adding a new dimension to the series' signature gameplay elements. The game's combat system is fluid and satisfying, allowing players to feel the power of Batman with every punch and kick.