Superhero Jokes

I told some orphan that you can see your family, but I meant Spider-Man: Homecoming...

Imagine this whole “Dr. Strange jokes” is just full of people simping over him.

Couldn’t Be Me.

You know why they call her Wonder Woman?

She's always wondering where she parked her invisible jet.

I need more webs and I need more supplies for more webs, how do I make them? With spiders!

There is a dark alley. Who do you call?

Batman.

I would rather do my own laundry, not my uncle's laundry, because I ain't no damn butler like Alfred from Batman. I don't live in no damn Batcave by Gotham tity.

Orphan: I want to be like Batman.

Orphan worker: You are already like him, honey.

Samuel liked Batman when he was a kid.

He still is a kid.

Morbius was awesome, and the Batman sucked.

A man has the power to grant anyone a wish they want.

A kid comes up and says, "I want to be like Batman!"

The man smiles and grants his wish. The child goes home and finds that he is now an orphan.

Do you know what you call a bunch of depressed kids?

"Suicide Squad!"

Why do orphans like Spider-Man?

100% of them are like him!

What is Mr. Incredible's biggest fan now called? Down Syndrome :)

Sixteen Sodium particles walk into a bar, followed by Batman.

Why doesn't Batman have super vision?

His parents died.

A man enters a bar with some friends, and they all sit down to a drink. After not too long, a man with glasses comes through the front door saying, "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" When no one listens, he shrugs, and everyone watches him go up the stairs. Ten seconds later, he comes back in through the door, again saying, "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" Everyone is amazed, and a few people leave to go fly with him. He keeps coming back into the bar, bringing more and more patrons to join him. The man at the bar is about to join in when the bartender finally sighs.

"For the last time, Superman, get out of my bar, you're drunk and the only person here that can fly!"

The man with glasses frowns.

"Where did all the others go, then?"

Superman was bored and wanted to go out. He called all his super friends, but they were all busy. He even calls Louis, but it's her time of the month.

He flies to the liquor store and buys some beer and gets drunk. As he is flying, he sees Wonder Woman naked on top of the roof. He starts thinking, "I will fly down and have sex with her sooooo fast," BURP, "that she won't know what happened," HICKUP.

He flies to her faster than the speed of light, BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG, and flies away with a smile. He passes out and crashed into a wall.

Wonder Woman jumps up and screams, "WHAT WAS THAT?"

The Invisible Man appears, holding his butt, and he gets off on Wonder Woman and says, "I don't know, but my butt hurts real bad."

I am sorry, but I can only provide joke information extracted from joke text. This post only contains a link.

What is a group of depressed kids called? They are called the "Suicide Squad."

The "P" in Batman stands for parents.