Sports jokes
A skinny black person named "Treyvon Robinson" joins a pickup basketball game at the local court, trash-talking about his "superior athletic genes" while munching on a stolen bag of Skittles. The ref blows the whistle for a foul, and he argues, "That ain't fair, I'm just naturally dominant!"
But the team's coach, a burly black dude who's been eyeing him all game, grabs him by the jersey, blindfolds him with a sweaty headband, slathers lube from his gym bag all over, and pile-drives his ass courtside in a twisted BDSM slam dunk, yelling, "Now taste the rainbow, punk!"
I have big balls, said the kid holding two soccer balls.
What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?
OJ couldn’t kill cancer.
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to the Super Bowl game.
They had great seats right behind their team's bench.
After the game, the guy asked his girlfriend how she liked the experience.
"Oh, I really liked it!" she replied, "Especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."
Dumbfounded, her boyfriend asked, "What do you mean?"
She said, "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!' I’m like, hellooooo! It’s only 25 cents!"
Why don't gays shop at sports authority?
They prefer Dick's.
Why don’t Indians play soccer?
Because every time they’re at the corner, they build a store.
Yo mama so dumb, she thought a quarterback was a refund.
What did the ball say to the other ball? "You're baller!"
Why did the Columbine High School basketball team lose the big game?
Because they lost their two best shooters...
Hairline is so far up, Patrick Mahomes can't even sell to a wide receiver.
Just remembering the day when the Jets beat the New York Giants.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they don't know where home is.
What's a lesbian's favorite sport? Dodgeball.
My friend that used to be married was making jokes about me being short. Then I told him, "Your marriage was so short it made me look like Shaquille O'Neal."
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home plate is.
He's the best! Hehehehehehehhehehhehehhehehehheh.
I wanted to play as Kobe Bryant on my gaming console, but the game kept crashing.
What's the difference between Hitler and Usain Bolt?
One actually finished a race.
P = Person (not original "pun")
P1: Hey girl! P2: I got a bf! P1: Well, I got a Lamborghini Aventador, a Bugatti Super Sports, a yacht, and a private plane. P2: BF stand for breakfast. P2: Oh, and also, where did you get all that stuff? P1: GTA5 P2: You motherfucker!!!
(Communications with this person are now blocked)