Sport jokes
Why can't Asians golf?
Because they can't drive.
Why are the Chinese bad at baseball?
Because they ate all the bats.
Why can't orphans play soccer?
They can't kick.
Bob and Brad loved baseball. When Brad was dying, Bob asked Brad to see if there was baseball in heaven. Brad died, and two weeks later, Bob woke up to Brad's voice. Brad said, "I've got good news. They do have baseball in heaven. Bad news is that you're up to bat next."
How do you make a suicidal guy go bungee jumping?
Tie the bungee cord around his neck.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Who’s the hottest girl in the world?
Babe Ruth cuz she catches the sun.
Why do orphans never play baseball?
'Cause they can never get a home run.
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
'What does it look like?' she finally asked. The policewoman replied, 'It's square and it has you picture on it.'
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. 'Here it is,' she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "OK, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop..."
What’s Mexico’s favorite sport?
Cross country.
I got a job at a library once. I got fired like an hour in because the library manager said that the cookbooks didn’t go into the women’s sports section.
What's a lesbian's favorite sport? Dodgeball.
A kid got a bike and a soccer ball for Christmas. He was still unhappy.
Why?
The kid had no legs.
Your clown is so stupid it took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
What's a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross country.
I asked my mum to be in the Paralympics, and she said I had to eat more vegetables.
Ball so hard! 😂🤣
Q: Why did the two gate-builders start fighting?
A: Because they were fencing.
I was playing Mortal Kombat with my friend when he picked the fighter Pristiano Penaldo. I won and the voice didn't say "Finish him," so I couldn't do a fatality.
I was confused, but I understood that the game didn't let me finish him because he is already finished.
What do you say before you jump off a building?
Parkour!