Sport jokes
What does Marcus Rashford say when he comes to the stadium?
I wanna kick some balls!
He turns, he shoots!
And that is a horrible end to the Grand National...
Q: How do basketball players stay cool during a game?
A: They stand near the fans! 🏀🏀😆😆
What are Russia's favorite netball positions?
Goal Shooter and Wing Attack.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can't find home.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because he can't find home.
Why shouldn't you let a Chinese person play baseball?
'Cause they'll eat the bat!
What’s better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?
Not being retarded.
Why can an orphan play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
What's the difference between soccer and a dead baby?
I don't wear steel cap boots when I play soccer.
GBM when he sees Soph (gets a boner) and has sex with Soph but realizes he forgot to put on a condom. Soph: "This is why Arsenal fans are so deluded and retarded."
Normal Fans after they lose the game: Good game, you guys played really well. GBM: "BRO REF WHAT THE BLOODY HELL YOU DELUDED ASS RETARD, OMFG WE LOST BECAUSE OF THIS REF!"
Adapt: Hey Adapt, did you know you're smart? Smart for being retarded. Yo Adapt!! You're so stupid that you gave me your Roblox account info and you said thanks about it!!
Barca fans after the LFC vs Barca game: We bottled it, damn it, we'll win the Copa Del Rey tho. Commie after the LFC vs Barca game: "YOU NEVER WALK ALONEEEEEEEEEE" Normal People: I support only 1 team. Commie: I support Barca, LFC, and AEK!! And I'm the biggest plastic in the server!!
What's got 6 legs, 3 arms, and 3 heads?
The finish line at the Boston marathon.
I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.
I was born and raised in Newcastle.
My grandfather used to tell me stories about Penaldo, a goblin from Portugal that travels to England when Newcastle is playing. He scores a tapin and then disappears until the next Newcastle game. I still have nightmares that he’s in our stadium.
Why can’t orphans play softball?
They can’t find home.
An orphan entered the high school for the first time. He has no knowledge of the school. He went to the secretary and asked where he shall go. The secretary then gave the orphan a schedule and said to the orphan, “Where is homeroom?” The secretary then asked which homeroom number he was assigned, and he said "1." The orphan then started to weep and said that his parents died right as he stole his first base in baseball.
I don’t get why Katniss was bitching so much in ‘The Hunger Games’ books. Ethiopia has been competing for years and I don’t hear any of them complaining.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They can't find a home.
Q: Why do orphans love playing tennis?
A: Because the ball comes back.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.