Short jokes
Why do laws forbid hoes from owning stocks in condom makers?
Answer: Insider trading.
What do you call someone 400lbs with a beer? A heavy drinker.
What do you call a ruptured Chinese man?
One Hung Lo.
Can we go back to 2001?
I bet it was more fun back then.
Why don't communists like Microsoft? Because it's Minecraft instead of ourcraft.
What has hands but can’t clap?
A thalidomide baby.
Luigi and Daisy are actually Aussie! How?
They wear GREEN and GOLD! The Aussie Colors!
Hey man, I was gonna tell a joke about 9/11, but it was just plane.
An orphan once said, "I will call my mum and go home."
A homeless kid once said he will go home.
I'm not a robot, but orphans are.
What do you call people from Paris?
Parasites.
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
If somebody gives you lemons, cut them in half and do the juice in his eyes.
My teacher got so mad at me for making 9/11 jokes, she hit me twice and I said, "Damn, got hit twice!"
I would've made a joke about Alzheimer's, too bad I forgot about it...
Dude, if there is a watermelon, shouldn't there be an earthmelon, airmelon, and a firemelon? The elemelons.
I love when I could run through the grass and feel the wind on my face.
Then my mom told me to get off VR, and then I wheeled myself to her.
Is that my student?
Na! It is Jesus!
Orphans are pretty tough. I mean, you never see them running home...
Why do emos love the winter? Because of the long sleeves.