Short jokes
Why did the wetback cross the river? To get to the US.
I was playing football and this guy comes to me, he was in a wheelchair.
We started playing rocket league.
Roses are red. The sun isn't shining. My mental state is rapidly declining.
What's better than having unprotected sex? Getting an abortion.
There is an Afghan Barbie; it’s a blow-up doll.
The second coming came and went. Jesus believed he was a Christian; therefore, he could never be himself.
Alcoholics don't run in my family, they drive.
A computer is a HARDware device. How come someone still feels it is MicroSOFT?
Why don't teachers give orphans homework? Because they can't go home...
What's a child abuser's favorite song?
"Just Beat It!"
What's the difference between genocide and mass murder?
Genocide is racist.
Why can't orphans have a Christmas list? Because they can't give it to their parents to tell Santa.
When midgets smoke weed, do they get high or do they get medium?
What do you call a midget born from precum?
"Half Nut!"
I make elevating music; you make elevator music.
Make like a drum and beat it!
Why are people disappointments? Because you are reading this.
How did I get to Iraq? I ran.
My favorite place to make a bonfire? Orphanages, of course, silly!
The reason Stephen sounds like a computer is because he ate his USB.