Short jokes
I would tell a Biden joke except everyone would not stop falling asleep (including him).
What's the difference between a gamer and dog poop?
Dog poop touches grass.
What do both a hooker and a customer have in common? They come onto each other.
Gay dik.
Smol Dik.
Plastik Dik.
Rubeh Dik.
Smooth Dik.
Metahl Dik.
I'm so poor I have to put my Big Mac burger on layaway.
"I'm very good in sports."
"In which sports?"
"EA Sports."
Why do orphans not like 1st-5th grade teachers?
Because they have a home room.
Why do laws forbid hoes from owning stocks in condom makers?
Answer: Insider trading.
Here’s one for the Aussies: What’s the difference between an echidna and a police car? All the pricks are on the inside.
Child abortion is like tax evasion: the more you lose, the less problems you have.
What do you call people from Paris?
Parasites.
I don't have a joke, I just have a friend named Jack.
Ever seen twins?
If you said yes, was it before or after 2001?
Q: What do the mob and pussy have in common?
A: One slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit.
What's the difference between Monday and a dick?
They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.
You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"
How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?
It's not nice to make 9/11 jokes. My uncle died in 9/11...
He was one of al qaeda's best pilots.
What does a plug do when he's horny?
He jacks off!
Finish the lyrics: Can I put my...
It took me 9.11 seconds to realize.