Short jokes
Guess what's "tiiiimmeeeee ABDE?"
....yes, it is "long time no see."
Jamal
Jesus and Satan are just basically Homer and Flanders. One tries to help the other, only for Satan to just say, "Shut up!"
If someone has a gun and tries to shoot you, just say, “Hipity hoppity, that gun is my property.”
Why do orphans have sex toys? Because the uncle isn't there.
I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad's half sister.
Roses are red, Epstein's face turned blue.
Trump's on that list, And there's nothing he can do.
Nutted in her braces, now my kids are behind bars.
What do you call it when an Astartes cum's... torrential downfall?
Waiter: Can I have your order?
Me: No, it’s mine!
Why does a brother love his sister?
Because he came in her.
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty was an egg?
What do you call an orphan's family tree?
A stump.
I always wear Puma, put my balls in your mouth.
What does a baby and a hand grenade have in common?
They both make noise when you throw them.
Why did the black lady give the IRS a mason jar full of watermelon seeds?
Tax credit.
What does gum in my d*ck have in common?
Both get chewed on by little kids.
Why didn’t Anne Frank just finish her diary?
Concentration problems.
Never joke about 9/11, they'll just crash and burn.
How do you trap a shape? You use a trapezoid.