Short jokes
What do women put on their ears to look more attractive?
Their knees.
What’s the difference between a feminist and a rock?
A rock can break a glass ceiling.
"Transgenders men in disguise".... A xxx Transformers parody coming soon to DVD.
How do you kill a little boy?
You throw him between two Catholic priests.
Why did Sally get a black eye?
Because she tried to play patty cake.
What do you call a funny family of chairs? A sitcom!
In my house, good sex sounds like seals slapping each other.
Q: What did the skeleton say when he proposed to his girlfriend?
A: Will you marrow me?
What was the last thing that crossed Princess Diana's mind?
The steering wheel.
What did Hitler get for his 6th birthday?
A Kewpie burger and an Easy-Bake Oven.
What will you call Burj Khalifa after 100 years?
"Bujurg" Khalifa. (Just a joke)
Why do people watch hentai?
Because they are as fake as pornstars are.
What is it about a beard and glasses that children find so sexy?
My humour is so dark that its life matters.
What's the difference between a baby and a mansion?
I've never seen the inside of a mansion.
I remember Grandpa's last words, "Oh, shit! It's in drive!"
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You a dumb a** b*tch, We all know it's true.
Every time I tell a 911 joke, it bombs.
Dark jokes are like Antarctica.
They're cold.
Stephen Hawking's death was simply an accident. He pressed power off instead of sleep mode.