Short jokes

What do you do if your online friend wants to commit suicide? You can't do anything, he's already on line.

I want to tell you a joke about 9/11... but I'm afraid it will be the bomb.

What brands do people in wheelchairs wear?

Michelin.

What is an orphanage's favorite Roblox game?

"Adopt Me."

TJ's hairline is so far back, if you travel back in time, you still won't find it.

I'm just like my LEDs, I'm meant to be hung.

I went to Starbucks today and they asked what I wanted, and I replied with "to die, a shot of bleach, and an deppresso expresso."

Your mom! Oh wait, you don't have one.

Why do trans women go by she/her?

Because if they went by her/she, they'd be Hershey's.

What do you call someone who makes a joke about society?

The Joker.

Arabs: WHO PUT THAT TOWER THERE... we must destroy it!

I told a joke about miscarriage to a group of women, but none of them laughed.

I guess it was a bad delivery.

Halloween joke:

What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?

A blood test.

Hello everyone, now a question to make it in there is no right or wrong answer, but who here has watched fireb0rn??

What do we want? A cure for obesity.

When do we want it? After lunch.

What is Michael Jackson's favorite instrument? A small skin flute.

What is the only video game to be ever made in Africa?

Where's My Water?

What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite holiday? 4th of July when they set off fireworks.

What is worse than a baby spinning at a hundred miles per hour on a washing line?

Hitting it off with a cricket bat.

I: "Get a boomerang."

Type: "Why?"

Me: "Because for frisbee, you need friends."