Short jokes
A gay couple walks into a Muslim bar. The tender flares up and says, “let me guess, a little blood on the rocks?”
I wish my grass were emo, so it would cut itself.
How many white police officers does it take to push an African-American gentleman down the stairs?
Push?! He fell...
A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his best friend's a pussy, and his owner beats him.
Why did God build a stairway to heaven?
So all the disabled people will have to go to hell.
I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen.
How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned?
Hi, I am just wondering who went into my account, 'cause I've changed my password, by the way.
What do you call an autistic person? Names.
I'm autistic myself, so don't go crying in my comment section.
Is it incest if it’s out in the open?
Or is it... outcest?
What do you call a stand-up comedian if the comedian doesn’t have legs?
What concert only costs 45 cents?
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
I told her she needed to put her dog on a leash, and her boyfriend is still on a leash to this day. 😮💨
Why did God create yeast infections?
So women would know what it's like to live with an annoying cunt.
What do you call Dr. Disrespect on top of a building?
Diddler on the Roof.
What do you call a cut cucumber?
A guy with no legs.
What does an orphan call a family photo?
A wishlist.
What do you call a person with Down syndrome in the military?
Special Forces.
I don't joke about vegans. That would be tasteless...
I have no beef with them.
What’s the difference between air and a six year old?
Air has resistance.
What’s the best thing about dating an orphan?
You don’t need parental consent.