Short jokes
I have so many orphan jokes. I'm afraid most of them won't hit home.
Why do goalkeepers have so much money in the bank?
Because they are really good at saving.
What do you call people who jump into the Hoover Dam?
Dam fools.
What is Saturn's favorite movie?
Lord of the Rings.
What if soy milk is just regular milk trying to introduce itself in Spanish?
"Mixed vegetables is just special ed class, change my mind."
What do you call an acid with a bad attitude?
A-Mean-O-Acid.
Today I learned humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
John
Q: What is it called when a hoe is getting ready for her party but doesn't know what to wear but is thinking about it? A: A thotprosses
As a scientist, I confirm that you speak too fast. It has a speed of 1 bullshit per second.
What does Drake call his rake?
Da-Rake.
How do you make Stephen Hawking mad?
You turn off the WiFi router.
What does a transgender call his/her parent?
Transparent.
What's the difference between an anal and oral thermometer?
The taste.
What did the balls say to the dick?
Hey dick, how's it hanging?
What did 50 do when he was hungry?
58.
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
If I send a clown to deliver flowers to my wife...
...is that a romantic jester?
A girl tried 77.34 (77.34) times to think of a word opposite of BYE. Then her brother divided the word BYE. 77.34 divided by 100. TRY IT!!