I asked a Scottish friend of mine how many sexual partners he'd had. He started counting, but fell asleep.
Short Jokes
I ran into a dwarf and he said: "Well, I’m not Happy."
Then which one are you?
Why can't religious women be raped? Because they are taught to never say no!
If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?
I'd make a joke about an obese person, but it won't work out.
Two skeleton brothers are talking.
1st bro: "Hey, get up! You and do some exercise! You are so heavy, you weigh a ton!"
2nd bro: "A skele-TON :)"
What's an African's favorite sport to play, but they can't? Water polo.
Putin's Brain:
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What can you say both at a funeral and during sex?
This would be much better if you were alive.
What do you call a Muslim who owns 6 goats? -- A pimp.
How do you blow up an Indian person?
You press the red button.
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Unnecessary.
What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can't hear an enzyme.
How did the octopus go to the war?
Well armed.
What time do butts get up? At the crack of dawn!!!
Roses are red. Walls are made of plaster. Schoolchildren can move fast, But bullets can move faster.
Why do dwarfs laugh when they run a race? Because the grass tickles their balls.
What's the most fun a monk can have?
Nun.
Why are the Chinese bad at baseball? Because they already ate the bat!
