Someone in London is stabbed every two minutes. Poor guy.
Short Jokes
What did Hitler feel about all the jokes about him? Führereous.
There was a plane crash. The pilot's names were Captain Sum Ting Wong, Wi Tu Lo, Ho Lee Fuk, and Bang Ding Ow.
So, a few hours ago my friend said I need to CUT it out with the s/h jokes... like... it's really not that deep?
Someone: When you suffer from depression and someone tells you to cheer up.
Me: My, what a great idea! Why didn't I think of that? ;)
Why does Donald Trump love little boys? Because his hands look massive when he’s holding their tiny little prepubescent cocks.
Why can't you kill a depressed person?
Because they are already dead inside.
Jon said: What do you call a pregnant woman?
Mike said: I don’t know, what?
Jon said: Kinder surprise.
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's joking.
I was about to say an African joke, but it was too dry.
Ok, there has to be SOMEONE on this website right now. Whoever that is, wanna chat? (I'm just bored)
I got introduced to a dwarf at a nudist colony the other day.
When we shook, the pleasure was all mine.
When your girlfriend has an abortion, it's kinda like dodging your own bullets.
The bushes outside got jealous after they saw your eyebrows.
Yo mama so fat that she needs two watches for two different time zones.
Me: Your ugly...
Person: I'm not your mirror...
Me: I never told you to be my mirror :p
Name an ant which is very heavy?
Eleph-ant.
Once I saw Donald Trump and an orange and couldn’t tell the difference 😂
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
Suicide is the way to get even with the bitch called probability.
