Short jokes
Do you know why the Japanese have squinted eyes? Because nukes are bright.
When midgets smoke weed, do they get high or do they get medium?
What do you call a dwarf suicide bomber?
A party popper.
"White people can't jump"...
"You must not have seen the twin towers on 9/11."
It must not be a good suicide story if you can tell it.
Welcome to Dave's Orphanage. "You make it, we take it."
What's a pedophile's favorite part of a hockey game? Before the first period starts.
Why did God make pigs before politicians?
He just needed some practice.
You can't be a loser if you have nothing to lose.
When your sad don’t feel down about yourself break someone’s leg and laugh.
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user? -- Meals on wheels.
Why was the guitar teacher arrested?
For fingering a minor.
When the Lego box says 6-99 years but you eat it in 20 minutes.
Why can't orphans go on an away trip? Because they already are on one.
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the Statue of Liberty? The statue stands for something.
As a child, my mother always told me she was going horse riding. My whole life changed when I found out she was under the horse.
I tried dressing up as the plane that crashed into the Twin Towers for the office costume party.
It didn't land too well.
Will my suicidal thoughts leave me too if I get attached to them?
I like my girls how I like my wine, 12 years locked in the basement.
Why couldn't the Japanese man give a high five?
Because Logan Paul left him hanging.