Short jokes
What do you call a monkey in a mine field?
BaBOOM!
Masochists and sadists are made for each other.
I wasn’t close to my dad when he died. It’s a good thing he stepped on a land mine.
Why did the sun not go to college? Because it already has a million degrees!
What’s one store an orphan can’t shop at?
HomeGoods ;)
I love my dog, Sadie.
What did a tree do for a human rights day at a tree?
I had no time today after a night with you today, but you walk away.
Kid at school tells an orphan, "I fucked your mom."
Orphan: "What's a mom?"
What did the potato say when the sweet potato told it to hurry?
I yam.
What did the rock say to the flower?
Rocks can't talk. -.-
Why can't LGBTQ+ members be straight? Because they are LGBTQ, they are losers.
Orphans are depressed, hahaha.
JFK
Half is definitely a bottom.
Spell "I C U P." I see you pee.
That is a "Penny-Farthing" bicycle. Dimes if you feed it beans.
Me: I want to be a stand-up comedian.
Friend: You have to be able to stand up.
What's an orphan's favorite Roblox game?
Adopt Me, so they can get adopted.
What do you call onions and beans?
Tear gas.
Q. What do rapists fear more than rabies?
A. Rape babies.
My mom said I rely on my devices too much, so I unplugged her life support.