Short jokes
What did the dick say to the asshole?
You need another dick.
Don't bully. Lol.
I once was sitting outside and watched the birds go by. I checked my watch and said, "My, how time is FLYING by!"
Why did the liberal cross the road?
(Ah, fuck this shit, I'm gonna kill myself!)
Suicide
What is the difference between the assassination of César and the assassination of Jesus?
They were both killed by Romans.
Why do the Greeks and Romans like food? Because food is good for you.
I saw a petition on replacing gravestones with trees so it will be a beautiful forest.
Son: Where's grandma?
Guy 1: What's your favorite vegetable?
Guy 2: Stephen Hawking.
Do the French people smoke weed or oui'd?
My best friend said, "Can you put your dick in me?" I said, "Can I cum in you?"
What did the bitch say to her sister when she stepped on her toe? Oww, mitosis!
Borthwick's hairline.
Travis has baby hands.
How bad is explosive diarrhea when a Muslim has it? Because my Chipotle blew up yesterday.
High school is amazing. Like if you agree!
My man is a pussy cunt that sucks my dick.
Joke's on him, he just asked me for bobs and vegana.
Q. Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
A. Because they hate the taste of their stupid clown wigs, makeup, and retarded shoes.
Dead people can’t cross the street because they're dead, ha ha!
A redneck and a Black man walk into a bar and order a drink.