Short jokes
Spppppp.
What did Sally get for Christmas?
Cancer.
Why did Marx never drink Earl Grey?
Because proper tea is theft.
When I go to bed, my mother comes in ten minutes later with a brick and beats me with it.
Did you hear about the cannibal who passed a politician in the jungle yesterday?
I hear it hurt like hell.
There once was a commie called Ed. Usually known as Ned. He went to bed, Got shot in the head, Unfortunately now he was dead.
I guess Canada's national igloo is melting because of global warming.
What did John say after someone shot his leg?
Oof!
No, you!
I gave my friends some buttons.
Too bad he couldn't pull himself together.
My abortion.
When this guy fell off a cliff, he got an A+ for egg-cellence!
"Can I tell you a paper joke?" I said, "But it is pretty terrible."
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
It didn't; it got stuck in a crack.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Doctor.
Doctor who?
How do you clean ash off a stove with chemicals?
Why is calculus called calc? Because you need a calculator. Lol.
Why did the cow go to space?
To get ice cream!
This is funny.
What is it called when a cow sings? A lawsuit.