Short jokes

What is the difference between Jesus and the devil?

When the devil came to Earth, he was the one with the nail gun.

By day I like girls, by night I like boys, but you, I wouldn’t like you at dusk or dawn.

What do you call a white kid looking at infants?

Pedophilia boy.

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The terrorists got a killstreak of 2,996; they are popping off, bro.

I ate Nemo.

I went to the super market one day and I saw a Caesar salad for 69 dollars. Next minute someone comes up to me and says, "Caesar deez nutz!"

Why can't an orphan play kickball?

Because they can't hit home.

I pregnoot.

Sometime ago I went to the morgue and asked if they took walk-ins.

What color is Sonic's ball?

Blue because he keeps getting rejected.

"Cummy wummy all over my mummy."

Why is my plane delayed?

Because someone hit the Sears Tower.

When a homeless kid goes to school and the teacher says, "You have homework tonight," he said, "Sorry, Teach, I don't got a home."

Your forehead is so big that I can’t even see your hairline, and your stupid forehead face.

I have to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.

Yo mama's so poor, the ducks throw bread at her.

Roses are red, violets are blue, You'll suck my dick 'cause I'm stronger than you.

Yo mama's so poor, she chases the garbage truck with a grocery list.

Yo mama so short, she went to see Santa and he told her to get back to work!