Short jokes
Why do you need an AR-15?
So my son can use it if he's being bullied at school.
Why is an apple not called a "red", but an orange is called an "orange"?
How does a pimp answer when asked why he chose his occupation?
Answer: He wanted a stable source of income.
What is a Christian's favorite social networking site?
Faithbook!
How do terrorists feed their babies?
"Here comes the aeroplane!"
I remember when I saw my dad's penis for the first time.
I said, "Dad, don't text me shit like that."
It's a joke, not a dick. Don't take it so hard.
What do you call a woman who sleeps with multiple men?
A whore.
What did the Indian say when the pizza was delivered to him?
"Hey! Who puked on the frybread?"
What's Elizabeth Warren's nickname?
Pocahontas
How do Chinese people name their kids?
They throw a wok down the stairs.
My sister looks like Santa Claus.
"You are so pretty?"
"No, too many people!"
My husband wants to tell me about my childhood.
Ok, I can't access the panel without the password.
What happens after you eat at a combination Chinese-German restaurant?
An hour later, you're hungry—for power!
Q: What do you call an angry, bullied Asian kid?
Shoo Ting.
Q. Why aren't Epstein jokes funny? A. Because it's such a touchy subject.
Q: What's the difference between Jeffrey Epstein and wind chimes?
A: Wind chimes don't make a gurgling sound when they're hung.
Why are Russians forced to drink grizzly bear piss in Russia?
Because vodka in Russia is weak.
Heh.
What's a kidnapper's favorite shoe?
White Vans.