Short jokes
What do you call a gay person in Antarctica?
Bi-Polar.
My grandpa is an asshole. The fucker deserved to die. The son of a bitch was using his life support, and I needed to change my iPhone.
How do Asian people name their children?
They throw a pan down the stairs.
What would your name be? Msg it to @chelsearosegraham.
Wonder why the Japanese people didn't see the bombs coming?
They didn't open their eyes.
Knock knock. Who's there? Bear. Bear who? Bear bum!
How do you fit three gay guys on a bar stool?
Flip it upside down.
What is a good night sleep? I love it when you walk home and walk home from school and walk home and walk home from home and walk home and get a good night walk and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from...
What is sticky, but it cannot stick a stick?
Why would you shoot up an innocent school... if your aimbot's dead and you can't commit headshots only?
Funni.
This joke here is the worst.
You are like my girlfriend: imaginary and non-existent.
What is more used than plastic?
Hookers.
Why is Bill the bad guy?
Monica wanted to suck dick.
Me: Are you an alien?
Friend: No.
Me: Yeah, because you're too ugly to be one.
I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.
Mom, start eating, or else you will get fatter!
787 bowing.
What can't a Desert Eagle and Barrett do for stealth missions?
They can't be way too loud.
Why did a school shooter get banned from a game server?
He was caught aimbotting.