Short jokes
What is the difference between interstate and intercourse?
We recently found out my grandpa is addicted to Viagra.
No one is taking it harder than grandpa.
What is an old lady's favorite exercise?
Trying to get up from the soft couch.
Guess whose parents didn't survive?
Liv's parents.
Your eyebrows run away like your dad.
Your eyebrows turned into little butterflies and flew away!
Even Captain Cook couldn't discover your forehead.
If I measured your forehead, it would be 100,000,000,000,000,000 miles long.
If you measured your hairline with a protractor, it would show 90 degrees.
Had to go to the barbers just to get your hairline sorted.
If your hairline was a river, it would meander left, right, and backwards.
I had to take the underground just to get from your forehead to your hairline, they're so far apart!!!
Caution: Looking at your hairline can cause you to be delirious and have hallucinations.
Health and safety tips: Looking at your hairline is hazardous. For your best interest, please look away.
Ever tried looking in a mirror lately? I wouldn't, your crooked hairline might break it.
This year the London marathon was run on your hairline. It was so far back no one could complete it!
CIA: Where's your head at?
JFK: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
What is the difference between you and a calendar?
A calendar has dates.
What does Mammot like on a woman’s body?
Bum bum bummmm buuummmmm bummm.
Why can't people eat pizza? Because they will be unavailable.