Short jokes
No wonder why I can't find you. You're in the trash bin.
Yo momma is so old, her birthday's expired.
Yo momma so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down!
Yo mama's so fat, her blood type is Ragu.
Yo mama's so stupid, she put airbags on her computer in case it crashed.
Even the World Trade Center underwent a better upgrade than your ugly ass.
A kid came to the orphanage with a dead fish. She was crying.
Why was the kid crying in the orphanage? Because someone came for the fish.
Whenever someone calls me ugly, I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.
You're so ugly that when you were born, the doctor threw you out the window, and the window threw you back.
Do you wanna lose ten pounds of ugly fat? Cut off your head.
What's the difference between a criminal and an orphan?
One is wanted and one's not.
"What time is it?"
"Daytime."
POV: you
Your manna so fat your father will be coming around the mountain when he cums.
Pretend you are an old man who is 77 years old and there are 7 doors, which door should you pick?
The seventh door.
Q: What was Hitler's least favorite candy?
A: Jujubes.
Jeff crosses the US border.
The second he crosses into the USA, a guy comes up with a gun.
Jeff: "That's what I was expecting."
Who loves walnut? Wallace!
Me: Ice woman diary: a witch's tin key.
Other: What? You said, "I swim in diarrhea, which is stinky?"
My love for you is like poop.
Whenever I feel you, I have to run to the toilet and flush you away.