Short jokes
A dad asked his son what kind of cake he wanted for his birthday, and he replied, "How about a urinal cake?!"
What do you call a stupid male Indian?
"Anshu-man."
Q: What time does an Asian go to the dentist?
A: 2:30
I went, I saw, I poop at hole. I make a portal.
What do you call a dead hooker?
It doesn't matter, she won't answer you.
Where is the most dangerous place for a human being to be?
In the womb of a woman who wants to abort her unborn baby. 😢
I wish I was a policeman, 'cause then I would actually have a gun to shoot myself with.
What did the kid with Parkinson's drink for breakfast?
Milkshake.
What do computer programming and 9/11 have in common?
They're both inside jobs.
My favorite planet is Saturn because it is tight next to Uranus.
What do you call an octopus with eight legs? An octo-pussy!
Depressed people are lame because they are just lame, no reason.
This is a Cuphead joke.
Why did the clown drive over the cup? Cuz he wanted to CRACK him up!
Q: What's an animation similar to Finding Nemo, but the fish has cancer? A: Finding Kemo.
Were you born on the side of the highway because that’s where all mistakes happen?
What's red, green, and smells like shit?
... Red and green shit.
If Bruno Mars was to run a pub and sell chocolate bars other than alcoholic drinks, then he'd have to call his pub a Mars Bar!
Do you want to go to the pool?
Yes? Well, water you waiting for?
1 + 1 = window.
My girlfriend said, "GIMME EIGHT INCHES AND MAKE IT HURT!"
So I pumped my dick in her 4 times and hit her in the head with a brick.