Short jokes
What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? "You're too young to smoke."
My pencil sharpener broke, so now my pencil is pointless.
Who is Stephen Hawking?
Once I sucked my mum's titties. Most adopted people won't know about that.
The earth is not round.
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Cats are like onions; when I cut them, I cry.
It's weird how Stephen Hawking's last name sounds like "walking and talking," but he could not do either of those!
I would tell you a joke about pizza,
but it's too cheesy.
Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
Yo mama's so poor, I knocked on the front door of her house and realized I was already outside in her backyard!
How do you tell the difference between a Communist and everybody else? The way they are spelled.
What kind of rape victim has a shower ten times a day?
The type that gets raped a lot.
Why did the cheetah need to fart on the lion? So he could win the race.
It would just be easier to be a gay guy, instead of a gender-fluid bisexual.
Q. What do rape victims miss?
A. Part of their brain.
Deez nutz!
What is orange and will soon be wearing prison orange? Trump.
Yo mama's teeth are so crooked, they have a British accent.
Why did Michael Jackson run?
Because he lost his glove.
What does the ocean do to its friends?
It waves.
(*Sorry I wasn't making any jokes for a while, I was getting sick of this thing.*)