Short jokes
My sister was hitting on my boyfriend. I'm 11, she's 9. She said, "Go f-ck yourself," so I said, "Okay, thanks for the idea!"
Campbell.
What do you call your sister who only has one leg?
Ei-lean.
Y’all can actually see them at all, my toe.
What's Barack Obama's favorite vegetable? It's Barack-olli.
I guess Neptune is next to Your Anus XDDDD.
Have you heard about the awesome fruit race?
The lettuce was ahead, but the tomato was able to ketchup!
Why did Leah throw the butter out of the window? To see a butterfly!
Why did the carrots laugh?
They saw Mrs. Green Pea over the fence.
What did my dad say before he went to go get milk?
"There's money in my wallet for pizza. I love you."
Big Dolly Parton hair, like an 80s prom queen!
I like fire trucks and monster trucks.
Why are you censoring my friend Franz? He's just making jokes, but you admins get offended too easily, f*cktards!
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What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
What's the hardest part about sex with a Thai girl?
Her, probably.
Why is the sun famous? Because it’s a shining star.
Sorry for posting this!
What's the difference between a gun and chips? When you bring it to class, everyone starts wanting to be your friend.
He jizzes canned cheese.
Your forehead [is] so big [that] every time you shout, your forehead starts pulsing.