Short jokes
What song can't orphans sing?
"Sweet Home Alabama."
Donald Trump didn't even finish the wall. He should have hired Mexicans to do it!
Why can't orphans breathe? They are drowning in their own tears.
An American walks into an Afghan bar. Joke, Afghanistan doesn't have bars because of the Taliban.
You're so small that when you go to the doctor, he doesn’t know you're there.
What if Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady, but couldn't stand up?
Why did the priest buy a clown suit?
Because the old one had blood all over it.
Yo mama so ugly, when Santa saw her, he said, "Ho, ho, hole shit!"
Me: Knock knock.
My sister: Who's there?
Me: I eat mop.
My sister: I eat mop who?
My mind: I eat my poo.
My sister getting it.
Am I considered a cannibal because I told my mom that Grandma's ashes were sugar?
Ha, orphans are soooooo funny. I mean, they have many family stories. Oh wait...
What do you call a Chinese hooker that won't get on her knees?
Cantonese...
A morbid joke would be what's going on in my mind.
Women be like, "Don't body shame," then goes to body shame men's heights.
Women be like men cause wars, [but] forget men fight those wars while they fake cry.
Why can orphans get away with robbing the bank?
Because no one wants him.
Someone asked me what the lines on my wrist were from. I answered, "My cat has OCD."
I used to work for a company called 69. My friend took over my position.
Tell an emo, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"
Irritable Bowel Syndrome saved me from depression...
It’s hard to feel empty when you’re so full of shiii fuck ur mom.