Short jokes
You know why they call her Wonder Woman?
She's always wondering where she parked her invisible jet.
Why do pirates pirate? Because they "Arrrrrrrrrgggghhh!" Hahahahahahahahaha!
What's the difference between an orphan and a dew?
One goes up and one goes down.
What's a ghost's favorite food?
I like some boo-ritos!
What appears over Ash’s head when he gets an idea?
A LightBulbasaur.
My dad told me and my sister to stop arguing, so I threw her out the window instead.
My career is worth more than your adoption.
I walk up to a kid. I ask where his parents are, and he started crying. Then I walked out of the orphanage.
Your hairline is so long that Odell Beckham Jr. missed a catch and saw your hairline from a mile away!
What looks like half a cat?
The other half.
What do you call a waterfowl looking at you from around a corner?
A Peking duck.
I'm in a wheelchair, right, so I've tried everything but one stand up.
It didn't work.
Your mom is so stupid, she got lost in Bed Bath & Beyond and slept on the floor.
What kind of car does Pikachu drive?
A Volts-wagon.
The boy was clapping, then he became clapped.
What's the difference between Mars and Africa? Mars has water.
Why did the baker's hands smell of shit?
He kneaded a turd.
Friend: You're adopted.
Orphan: At least I was chosen!
Friend: At least I was kept.
What do you call California when it’s having a wildfire? Completely normal.
If you've been thinking about singing karaoke with a friend, just duet.