Short jokes
What are twins’ favorite fruit?
Pairs 🍐.
An alien goes to Area 51, but I wonder why he doesn't go to your house?
I once went to the bank with some raisins because I wanted to set up a current account.
What time is it when you can smell smoke inside?
Time to get outside!
When I feel ugly, I just look at my brother and get over it.
What's the difference between you and me? You're not strangling a man with a cloak on.
What did a car say hi to?
It said hi to the school.
"Hi, honey, how do you want buns?"
What month has 28 days?
All of them.
Whoever invented the knock-knock joke should get a "no bell" prize.
Two skeletons meet at the graveyard at noon.
"What the heck are you doing here?"
"I couldn't sleep."
Why do golfers bring an extra pair of socks? In case they get a hole in one.
Did you hear about the man who swallowed his watch?
He went to the doctor hoping he could give him something to help pass the time.
What do you call a sad Doge?
What?
Nothing but Sarrrooooddd!
What do you call a cow in a moving van?
A: A mooving cow.
What is the difference between a small child and a watermelon?
One I eat on the daily and the other is a watermelon.
A girl named Ranch went to the store and stayed there. Why? Because she was ranched!
I didn’t wanna tell you, but I had to write this song, cause I’m in your house every night doin' your mom.
I'm doing something Stephen Hawking can't do... pressing "I'm not a robot."
Why did the man sit on his porch and bark at the postman when he came?
Because his dog had a sore throat!