Short jokes
Your hairline is in a different area code.
I was in the bedroom slapping your girl harder than Will at the Oscars.
What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire?
Hot wheels.
What kind of overalls does Mario wear?
Denim-denim-denim!
Why do orphans not like July 24th??
Because it's Parents Day.
How is toilet paper recycled?
Easier than you would think, but first they have to process the crap out of it.
You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.
Why are orphans sad when playing Roblox?
There isn't any parents on Roblox.
My favorite film is The Hunchback of Notre Dame.
I love a protagonist with a twisted back story.
If I'm holding a cricket ball in each hand, what do I have?
A really fucking huge cricket.
You’re so fat; if you go outside now, you’d be arrested for breaking social distancing guidelines.
Why did the orphan get sent to the principal's office?
Because he punched dumbos like you people!
Me: Do you like smash?
Friend: Smash Rolls?
Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS!
Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)
I saw my sister sucking a big toe.
What do Emos say when they trick-or-treat?
"Boo-hoo!"
I traded my sister for a slice of pizza. Damn, that pizza was good!
What goes oOoOo on your breath that scared away the animals from the farm?
My Crandall just be smashing more than you ON DA GIRLS, and he was slapping your girl last night harder than WILL at the OSCARS! ;)
Why do orphans hate playing sports in school?
Because they never get picked.
This guy came into my library a year ago and borrowed a book named "How to Commit Suicide." He never returned it.