Short jokes
Confucius say, "Man who bite electric wire get shocking experience!"
I got shot once. Now I'm holey.
Why do emos cut themselves?
To play noughts and crosses.
I've been going to the dentist for a while now, I know the drill.
This rat did the most amazing thing ever; it was pretty radical, dude.
Your maw *microsoft shutting down noise*
I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age, but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.
Why do bees stay in the hive during winter?
... S'warm!
Once we went to a light bulb party last night, YO it was freakin lit.
What did Connor Lys Clark say to Karl Kassulke? "I love bridges!"
I went to the store, and yeah...
What's worse than finding one dead baby in a bin? Finding one dead baby in five bins.
How's it going @#$!
What was the first man made out of? Adams! (Atoms)
Did you hear about the Mormons?
What is the thirstiest ocean in the world?
The Gulf of Mexico lol!
How do you know someone is fucking dumb?
They put jokes that have been used several times already.
Lawrence in maths ;)
What do you call a hill with cows on it?
A Moo-ntain.
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home ;)
Orphan: Just two things I don’t have.