Short jokes
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch some chips and sweets.
No, he can't keep his heart rate down, and she's got diabetes.
I love you, my new phone! 📲
Kid: "THERE'S A SHOOTER IN THE BUILDING!"
Shooter: "Oops."
What's the difference between an emo and a prisoner?
The prisoner.
How can you never find a hippo hiding behind a weed?
Because they're so good at it.
One day, I was just chillin', being a tower. I saw a plane, but it was slowly growing.
Then it hit me.
Your mum (mom) so fat, she wore a yellow T-shirt, they said "Taxi!"
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and orphans?
The parents remember 9/11.
Dad, sad, bad, rad, nad, tad, glad, clad, plaid, had.
When you go to an orphanage for a field trip: When the workers said, "I remember you as a kid."
You say Alex Jones, I say Alex moans mmmmm. I like that fat, tasty big boy and his Rolex watches, mummy, he turns me on!
Q: When a chip gets popped, what happens to it?
A: It gets pooped out of the bag.
Six shila.
Why is Death the world's biggest slut?
Death gets to f*** everyone.
Yo mama's so old, she knew Burger King when he was a prince.
Your dad is so smart, he took one look at you and left.
What did the suicidal leprechaun say?
"Irish I was dead."
Someone cutting the cheese then farted.
Someone sees the cheese, and it smelled like crap (literally). He said, "Who cut the cheese?"
I'm Priya.
Dino nuggets are kinda hot. Also, I want to fuck the brown M&M.