Short jokes

Short jokes

Pilot

It's not nice to make 9/11 jokes. My uncle died in 9/11...

He was one of al qaeda's best pilots.

Trouble

I got in trouble in school today. The teacher said, "I'm gonna call your parents!"

I said, "Let me know when you find them." <3

Kid

What is a kid's favorite thing to do with their dad?

Play pretend dog in the bed.

Hairline

Seeing so many balding college students is so sad. Like, why the fuck is your hairline graduating before you?!?

Kid

Normal Kids: Today is a lovely day.

Emo kids: Here lies Chris, he shot himself!

Fight

Two friends fighting.

Friend 3: "Cut it out, you two!"

Friend 4: "It wouldn't help if they cut it out... Believe me... I've tried..."

End

These jokes have a good build up, but in the end, they all come crashing down.

Grass

Tired of having to cut your grass? Dye it blue, and it will die itself.

Dog

Did you know China wanted to send a dog to space?

They didn't because they ate it.

Tower

Why did the North Tower want chocolate ice cream?

Because he didn't want plane.

Father

Your dad went to get the milk, but he was actually trying to find his father. He wasn't there.

Funeral Home

(Phone call) This is Frank's funeral home and grill, where yesterday's grief is today's beef. How may we help you?