Short jokes

Q: What's 1+1? 2+2? 4+4? 8+8? Name a vegetable.

A: Carrot 🥕

A few years ago I had a brush with cancer...

All of the bristles fell out!

Me: "Cya"

Mom: "Where ya going?"

Me: "The orphanage to make yo mama jokes."

Mum: ...

Sans: What do you have there?

Frisk: A KNIFE!

Sans: NOO!!!

Thanks to the voice who keeps telling me to let go,

he is my only motivation for trying again.

So there was a reason why I hated math.

I suck at problem-solving.

You're so fat that when you got to McDonald's, they had to call Wendy's for backup.

Lessi

When I dunk my cookies in milk, I think of you. I hold them down until the bubbles stop.

Which country can swim?

Finland. Get it? Fin Land?

My friend Enyaw is gay, she is a cunt.

I go out with enyaw, now she is just gay now.

Why was the soldier reading the Geneva convention?

To-do list.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

An apple gets picked.

Quote of the day:

Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.

[Comment your favorite fall beverage!]

Sometimes when I'm sad, I remember I have a big dick.

What did the plane say to the towers: "Can't go over it, can't go under it, oh no, we got to go through it."

I tried to organize a professional Hide-and-Seek tournament, but it was a complete failure. Good players are hard to find.

I have an addiction to cheddar cheese, but it's only mild.

I want to run. I go Iran, because I RAN, not IRAN, because it’s an Iran joke about the country, not the movement.