Short jokes
LAMO.
Why didn't the boy want to read "2000 Leagues Under the Sea"?
It was too much pressure.
Two fish in a bowl. First fish asks, "Haven't I seen you around here before?"
The second fish replies, "F**k me, a talking fish!"
Glip gloop glap.
I love still things.
Why is daonlyjuanhere an orphan?
Because he is the only one.
What do you call a hippopotamus that stands out from the crowd?
A hipster!
911 help. Hello?
Never mind, forget it. You're so stupid 😡😡😡😡😏
What do you call a cow that no one likes? The mooser.
To spite Santa and Greta Thunberg, I'm burning the coal I got for Christmas.
"Scoop pa tun manaa?"
My brothers kept annoying me.
I told them I would disembowel them if they kept it up.
It was an empty threat—right after I was done.
What would the Mandalorian be called if it was made in an aquatic center?
Mandachlorian.
For some reason, quarks sound really strange to me.
Austin Nash
"Orange, orange, orange."
"Knock, knock."
"Orange."
"Orange you happy I didn't say orange again?"
She does not wanna fuck you, and she don’t need you clapping them cheeks.
A can of worms popping up and down inside a lot of people and a girl ate the can of worms: It was her imaginenation.
Why did the dog want a kiss? Because he can see his knees.
While I was walking on the road, a cat crossed my road, and 5 min later I found it fell in the gutter.