Short jokes
I named my dog Stone so that I can say to people that I throw stones every day.
Why are mountains so smart?
'Cause they have a degree.
Line (DYM 105)
I like mangoes.
I just did a test to see who my soulmate is, and it said "best friend." So I guess I am gay. I think so, WTF.
What is a gorilla's favorite cookie?
It's chocolate chimp.
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
Hana?
What did George Washington Carver have anything to do with gorillas? It's a little possible, ya dummy!
Why are Nepalese bad at chess?
Because someone already killed their king!
Sometimes I look at someone I hate and think, "I hope you get laid tonight."
By a tweaker with AIDS.
Wanna come hang out with me?
"Slow and steady wins the race."
Hey, this is to orphans:
"Orphans are ugly. We need to know each other :D We need to date, cause ur hot and so am I and orphans rly are ugly!!!!"
Why can I be black? Because I look like I have puberty, and I sound like I had puberty.
Hi my sweet friends! This is for everyone who needs help right now :)
What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Your Boyfriend.
Your Boyfriend who?
Your Boyfriend who doesn’t love you! Bye!
Twitch & YouTube revenue. Haha funny joke, eheh!
What did the acorn say when it grew up?
Geometry.
(Geometry= "Gee, I'm a tree!")