Short jokes
What did the orphan say to his father?
Nothing, he doesn't have one.
An assassin threatens a planet.
The planet remains calm.
The assassin: "Do you not realize the gravity of this situation?"
What time is it when a nurse's here?
It's nurse-thirty.
Wanna hear a joke about Donald Trump?
Ok, Melania totally married him for his good looks, believe me!
Why don't you shower with a Pokemon? He might Pikachú.
Quit making those progeria jokes. They get old very quickly.
What noise does Sally like to say? Splat!
Why doesn’t the sun ☀️ go to college?
Because it has a million degrees.
How can you tell if your sister is on her period?
Your father's dick tastes funny.
What did the leper say to the prostitute?
Keep the tip.
What's India's favorite font?
Comic Sanskrit.
Q: What do you do if you bump into a koala?
A: You koalagize to it.
A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will win. Sadly, no pun intended.
What's the difference between an air blower and Little Boy?
When the air blower blew, it did not wipe out Hiroshima.
I raped a disabled child.
I think she's too far gone to repair now.
If you take a shot, a paper wad, in the trashcan, and call "Kobe!" but miss, it's still a Kobe.
Mfs be saying Kobe is good at basketball cause he is 6 feet, ye 6 feet underground.
When in Poland people go to a house party, and the atmosphere is bad, nobody is talking, they say: "Is there a German here?"
What is blue, green, flat, and has teeth?
The Earth, but I lied about the teeth.
Me: Opens the window to get some fresh air.
Everyone else on the plane: 😟...😱