Short jokes
What is Jesus' favorite sport? CrossFit.
Your mouth looks like it came from the commercials.
What do you call a guy who has sex on the Moon?
An “Astronut”!
When Ariana Grande walked into the church, she said, "GOD IS A WOMAN!"
What do you do when you run out of lines on your book?
You look at the emo girl and say, "Hey, can I borrow your arm?"
On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?
What do you call a dwarf in a drawer?
Gay.
I got my blind friend a TV... He never uses it.
What's the difference between an orphan and a puppy?
Parents enjoy the presents of a puppy.
What does a condom and a coffin have in common?
They both still have stiffs, but one is coming and one is going.
Orphan: *crying* You: Do you know where your parents are? Orphan: No. Your Friend: They don't have parents!!! You: 😂 I know.
Riddle me this. Riddle me that.
Why did my parents never come back?
Why is Santa always a b*tch, calling people names like, "Hoe, hoe, hoe?"
What did the toilet say to the other toilet?
"You look flushed."
Your forehead built like Darkseid from DC.
Roses are red, I sniff marijuana, I have five fingers, The middle one is for your vagina.
Your forehead is so big you could have put an H for Kobe to land on.
You know Hitler loves you when he comes up to you on Valentine's Day and he says, "Will you be my Valenein?"
If aliens were real,
then orphans would finally have a home.
Mom: Kid, bring your toys and clothing to the car. We're going to Disney Land.
Kid: Ok.
*Bring kid to the orphanage*.