Short jokes

Why was Michael Jackson so loved? He touched so many children in so many special ways.

My love for you is like poop.

Whenever I feel you, I have to run to the toilet and flush you away.

One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.

"What?" Angelica replied.

"I'm a guy."

I'm so friking dumb, even I need Joe Mama so fricking bad.

Why can't you get water in the North Pole?

Because there is no well.

When someone says don't talk back to me, say, "I wasn't aware that answering a question was considered talking back."

Some people are such treasures that you sometimes just wanna bury them.

Treat me like a joke, and I will leave you like it's funny.

I want to di... dive! Yeah!

What's the difference between me and a corpse? I mean, I'm not dead... yet, right?

What do you get if you cross an avocado and a Glock?

Glockamole.

What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?

Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda...

I saw this boy named Phone. He said where would he live? I said an orphanage.

I think I'm colorblind. News came out of purple.

Every second, 1 kid gets diagnosed with homework.

If you hate pedophiles, grow up.

What is Bill Cosby's favorite poem? Roses are red, my cum is blue, I'll wait till your asleep to rape you.

Little Johnny was learning about anal sex, when he learned what it was he said, "My uncle just calls this shhhhh..."

Why can't orphans ride a bike?

'Cause their parents won't follow them.

There is no god. None, not one.