Short jokes
Why did the cop ask the orphan if he was home alone?
The orphan said because my parents have never come back yet because I have none.
What do altar boys and strippers have in common? Father issues.
What do you do when a French kid steals your pencil?
Load your MP-40 and tell him that you give him a history lesson on WWII.
I photo bombed someone's selfie, and then they yelled, "Why would you do that? I was trying to take a family photo!"
Why do most orphans cook for themselves?
They don't have a home cook.
What's Link's favorite porn video? The Legend of Zeldas Sucking.
Your mom is so hairy that King Kong got jealous of her.
What do you call someone who gets killed at 12 o'clock on New Year's? First kill of the match.
A "monster" that has 2 heads, 2 bodies, 6 feet, why am I not afraid of the "monster"? It's my dad riding a horse.
What cheese do monsters eat? Monsterella.
Me: Ice woman diary: a witch's tin key.
Other: What? You said, "I swim in diarrhea, which is stinky?"
Who loves walnut? Wallace!
Why doesn't Newton cut trees in vanilla Minecraft? Because he wants Minecraft to be realistic!
For some reason, when my mom eats hot dogs, she likes to lick and suck on it first. As a son, can anyone tell me why?
Why did Hitler's cookies taste bad? He forgot to clean out the oven.
What’s the worst part of being a pedophile?
Getting the blood out of your clown suit.
Knock knock, who's there? God.
God who? NO, you idiot, there is no God. I am your father and you have locked me out of my own house!
Really gotta love all the morons who, instead of sharing irreverent dark jokes, say the stupidest shit pertaining to Christianism.
What’s the difference between a bank vault and you aunt's anus?
The owner of bank vaults don’t force you to penetrate it.
Why don't bald eagles brush their teeth? Because they don't have teeth! xD