Short jokes
What did the terrorist do when his kidneys failed?
Dial-ISIS!
When I was in middle school, I was kidnapped by a terrorist organization.
Al-gebra.
"Hey, today was great!"
"What happened?"
"I ran into my ex today."
"What's so great about that?"
"I was in my car!"
HELP! I MIGHT BE A RELIGIOUS EXTREMIST BECAUSE MY RHYMES ARE DA BOMB.
Flex tape can fix a sawed-in-half boat. Then how the f*** can it not fix the Titanic when it broke in half? Tell me!
When my family goes to weddings, my senior relatives tell me things like “You’re next!” So I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Dark humor is like water, some people get it, some people don’t.
If I had to rate the attack on the Twin Towers from the Muslims, I'd give it a 9/11.
Mom, am I adopted?
What? No. "In head" No, dah, bitch.
Someone said to stop hurting myself, but I'm still trying to cut my arms off.
What is a joke that will never end even though you want it to?
For me, life.
Roses are red,
I don't know what is brass.
I tell myself,
"Don't touch grass."
What do white people and fences have in common? They both get jumped by Mexicans.
Your hairline is so bad even Ariana Grande stopped singing because of it.
Why are orphans good at dodgeball?
They can dodge adoptions.
Why do people adopt orphans?
They get cash.
What's a similarity of an orphan and a deaf kid?
They both can't hear their parents.
I stopped a terrorist from killing 100 people on a plane using self-control.
My bad, but you stink so bad you passed by a trashcan and it yelled, "Wow! I didn't know I had family!"
I'm a poor Indian, please help me.