Short jokes
What is more fun than throwing a baby off a cliff?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
What do iPhones and the Titanic have in common?
There's no Jack!
What do the Titanic and the Sixth Sense have in common?
Icy dead people.
People love you.
Don't die.
Why can’t Indian women drive?
They’re too used to riding their camels.
My classmates?
Yesterday I saw an orphan kid playing GTA and told him he can't get 5 stars because he ain't wanted.
Don't listen.
Americans: Miles per hour.
Europeans: Bullets per kid...
What do ninjas and depressed people have in common?
They're always cutting.
The ball kept getting bigger and bigger...
And then it hit me.
Bro has to get a fringe to cover up the big, increasing hairline.
You know you have weird Indian parents when you can hear them canilingus each other.
Your dad died of hunger on the journey to find the milk.
What does a knife have but not my life...
A point.
What did the passengers of the plane say when they saw the airplane strip? Nothing, because it was not an airplane strip, but a tower.
My girlfriend broke up with me because I quote Linkin Park too much.
But in the end, it doesn’t even matter.
I was sitting in traffic the other day.
Probably why I got run over.
A weasel walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Wow, I’ve never seen a weasel before. What can I get you?”
“Pop,” goes the weasel.
Where do you take someone who’s been injured in a peek-a-boo accident?
To the I.C.U.