Short jokes
Q: I like elephants.
A: Everything else is irrelevant.
Q: I like elephants.
A: Everything else is irrelephant.
What do you call a Muslim bee?
Habibee.
All those people claiming Donald Trump is like Hitler need a reality check.
After all, it's not like Donald Trump could write a book.
Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person.
"Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945.
Why do blind kids like plane crashes?
Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.
I am awesome, look at me!
Which tower is better at playing catch? The south tower, obviously. It caught 2!
What's brown and in a baby's diaper?
Michael Jackson's hand.
Well, you know what they say, time flies when you're just a ball of anxiety and stress. :D
When you see your mom.
Me: bruh
Her: Are you serious right now bro?
Me: Yeah no shit.
Her: *slaps me*
When butterflies fall in love, do they feel humans in their stomach?
Hey kids, guess who started a micronation?
It’s Barney and Trump. They don’t let gays in, but they kill them.
What do you call a very long bowl?
Manute Bowl.
What the when what yeah what yeah then uh huh?
Boy, your forehead so big, I can make a launchpad on that shit!
I came across a dead body in the woods. I liked it so much I came again.
You twin towers because I'm tryna ram in you tonight.
Why is the record for longest jump kept by an emo?
They're still hanging.
No, it's not just a crotch grab. Jacko was jacking it on stage when he saw a 6-year-old boy in the front row.