Short jokes
Daughter: Mommy, what ever happened to Steven Hawking?
Mother: He died.
Daughter: How did he die?
Mother: He never got recharged.
Lesbians and blind women wear the same clothes.
My sister's name was Philma. We were unfortunate enough to have the last name Coochie. Let's just say no more virgins were at that school.
The lettuce and tomato were in a race. The lettuce was a head and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
I had a dream about a car, and I woke up exhausted.
A dung beetle walks into a bar and says to another beetle, "Is this stool taken?"
What's hot and hard?
Me when I look at children.
Black dog is gay.
How do cows laugh?
Moo-haha.
Why is Hugh's mum so fucking fat?
Because she ate the 34 other kids she had but now only has 6,789.
How do you circumsize a hillbilly?
Kick his mother in the jaw
What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed?
High steaks gambling.
What do city plumbers and pedophiles have in common?
They both lay pipes in public parks.
So three retards walk into a classroom...
Sike, it was the garbage. They mistook it for their classroom.
Did you hear about the light bulb party? Yeah, it was pretty lit!
A girl named Rebecca was friends with a guy called Fi. One day, Fi hit Rebecca, and Rebecca lost service.
Rebecca said to Fi, "Why-Fi?"
What did the Pokemon lover say when he got to the shoe store?
I have to Pikashoe.
What's the hardest thing about being a rapist?
My dick.
Hey! Some idiot drew a cat on this pillar! Wait... does that make it a caterpillar?
I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.