Short jokes
You're so short you could be drowned by heavy rains.
You’re so short, you could sweep under your bed while standing.
You’re so short, I bet you don’t have to bend to tie your shoelaces.
You're so short that you build a tiny house for yourself.
You're so short that you use a ladder to reach the potato chips!
You're so short that you don't have to open the front door to get inside the house.
You're so fat that you're as big as UY Scuti!
Dwarf: pulls down the flap for the mirror.
Also dwarf: can’t see.
Why couldn't the twins never do anything right?
Because they were triplets!
Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn't chicken!
What’s the difference between an apple and a depressed kid? The apple falls from the tree.
what is the difference between a basement full of dead prostitutes and a bowling ball in the basement?
I don't bowl.
Bf: What do you think about our love?
Gf: Count the stars in the sky.
Bf: Aww, it's infinity.
Gf: Nope, just a waste of time.
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite movie?
Black and white.
How do you spot a cow?
With a bingo dabber.
Incest. A game the whole family can play.
When your mom says, "Go to bed," but you reply with, "But Mom, I need help because it is inside, but we are outside."
I'd tell you a joke about my boyfriend's dick, but it's a private joke.
What famous book writer for kids loved insects?
Beatrix Potter.
Have you heard of the current event in Africa? It’s called the Hunger Games.