Short jokes

Me to my friend: I only date suicidal girls.

My friend: Why?

Me: Because that pussy is limited edition.

Meeting a girl at a park is good, but parking meat in girl is better.

Me: *Calls friend* "Dude, I just fell off a 50-foot ladder!"

Friend: "Bro, you ok?!"

Me: "Yeah, lucky I only fell off the first step!"

The best quote by Kim Jong Un:

"Meeting girl in park is good, but parking meat in girl is better."

My brother likes his Vegemite so black, it stole our car.

Google is butt.

Hi, I have a question for you.

Did you know that reading this is wasting your time?

Yeah, sorry xD

What do you call Cyanne when she first wakes up? Nanny McPhee.

Gwen is a 40-year-old man, I think.

"Back To The Future"-Doc: You can time travel to anytime in HISTORY, Marty, but NEVER go to the year 2021.....

Okay, okay, so one day I was on the way home, and this kid said, "Man, I could kick your butt." Five seconds later, I kicked his butt.

Your family tree looks like a circle 💀💀💀

(Kids Doing A Science Project.) Kid 1: Did you bring Uranus?

Kid 2: Never leave home without it.

Why do Japanese people hate iPhones? Because they're scared that American airdrops will fall on them.

"Yo (DYM 107)"

Q: How did Helen Keller break her wrist?

A: Reading road signs.

Your mama so fat she sunk the HMS ship!

Why can’t orphans have a good childhood?

Because they could not go to theme parks! 😅😅

Remember kids if ur ever mad beat up an orphan what are they gonna do call their mom??

I hate you, Gwen. You are a stupid idiot!