Short jokes
Your mum's so fat, she's the iceberg that sunk the Titanic!
A: Knock knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Package from Ted Kaczynski.
B: Package from Te-?
A: BOOM!
Kart! (DYM 151)
My name is Dan, I wear white Vans, I have a gun, get in the van!
What did Hitler say to the sheep, "Baaarrrrrrr!" Hahaha, get it, sister? Am I rightttt?
What's the best way to get a man to confess to a rape?
Ask him to tell a rape joke.
Mario (DYM 150).
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My wife accused me of being a cross-dresser, so I packed up her clothes and left.
Me: Sister, are you wearing makeup?
My sister wearing all the world's makeup.
Sister: Just a little.
Are you winter? Because you will be coming soon.
Are you a haunted house?
Cuz I am gonna be screaming when I come inside you.
Are you a horse, because I want to ride you?
What do you call a man with farts?
DEEZ NUTS!
MVP means: “Most Valuable Player.”
In Chuck Norris' case: “Most Vaginas Penetrated”.
What is it called when an art teacher has a heart attack?
An art attack!
What does a woman’s pussy and a chainsaw have in common?
Miss by a few inches and you’re in deep shit.
Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.
(sorry in advance this joke is brutal)
What has 12 heads and 24 eyes?
The bin at the back of the abortion clinic.
I once had an emo friend doing a course for the marines. He made the cut.