Short jokes
Q: What do you say to a kid who threatens to beat you up?
A: We can always rearrange your liver 😏
Do you know why the Japanese have squinted eyes? Because nukes are bright.
What day are twins born the most?
Toos-day.
What do orphans not see on a controller?
The home button.
What does a depressed person and a fashion enthusiast have in common?
They both have something hanging in their closet.
My grandpa died during World War II. He was the best concentration camp guard they have ever seen. RIP.
What did the female rapper say when her boyfriend pulled his pants down and exposed his huge balls?
“I like big nuts and I cannot lie!”
Knock knock. Who's there? Dees. Dees who? Dees nuts!
(Or dees nuts in yo mouth!)
I hate when my class want to play hangman. Not because they hang a man, but because I get jealous.
Why don’t Chinese people model? Because it would look like the same model every time.
Leo be like: "I like men, yes."
Are you Pikachu? Cause I want to take a "pik" at you.
Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?
The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....
Your forehead is so big, it looks like I did a drag back on FIFA.
Since Christopher Reeves can't play Superman, they got a new person: Christopher Walken.
Chuck Norris built the hospital he was born in.
Why don't orphans go to Family Dollar? They don't have a family to go with 'em.
What does the hare say to the other hare? You look nice with your hare cut!
Your mum's so fat, she's the iceberg that sunk the Titanic!
A: Knock knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Package from Ted Kaczynski.
B: Package from Te-?
A: BOOM!