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Shooting jokes

So, once upon a time, there was a man who lived in his house with his wife.

He got up to go out to work and closed the front door behind him.

Not even four seconds later, he came back inside panicking, saying, "There's a rabbit with a gun outside!"

The wife replied, "Oh, don't worry, rabbits don't have guns. They can't shoot people; you must be imagining things."

The man calmed down for a few minutes, and after some reassuring, he eventually decided to try to go back out to work again.

So he stepped outside the front door, and the rabbit shot him.

I looked up how fast cum shoots and it said 28 mph. That means that ejaculation is illegal in school zones!

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    • Teachers: Whenever there’s a school shooting, hide under the desk.

    Students: Hiding under desk.

    Shooter: Well, no one’s in here!

    Me: How does this thing work?

    ForTnite kid: Oh, you don’t know how to use a pistol? Look, I’ll show you.

    ForTnitekid: *shoots foot*

    Me: That wasn’t a very good demonstration.

    It hasn't been the same since Kobe died. I can't say "Kobe" anymore when going to shoot a shot. Now I have to say, "Kobe crash!"

    I wish I was a policeman, 'cause then I would actually have a gun to shoot myself with.

    What did the cop say after he shot the ginger?

    "I guess orange is the new black."

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    • You get on an elevator and you find the Pope and Donald Trump cowering from two snarling wolves. In your hand you find a revolver with only two bullets in it... what do you do?

    You shoot the Pope and the Donald each in a leg and exit the elevator at the next stop.

    Why did the CSI team have to go to the "Purple Rain" shoot?

    Because they had to dust for Prince! hahaha

    You know shit is going down when anything pumped up kicks related is brought into school.

    Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.

    So I was on a Discord call the other day, and one of my friends, an American buddy, joined, and we had a conversation.

    Until they said: "When did pounds change to quid?"

    And I said: "They're the exact same thing."

    Then they said: "But when did it happen?"

    So I said: "When did school change to shooting range?"

    One time the dog got bit by a snake, so my dad had to shoot it. My dad said to me, "This is what's going to happen to your little brother." "What little brother?" Exactly.