What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
She choked.
She Jokes
My last relationship ended because my ex-girlfriend accused me of being a rapist. I'm not upset. To be honest, I didn't like her anyway. She kept telling me I never listen, or something like that.
I know this isn't the real chicken wing song, but my version...
"Chicken wing, chicken wing, I want your mommy. Slap her with my hairy salami while she's still yawning."
Make your own chicken wing song and put it in the comments... :)
Yo mama so ugly that she turned Medusa to stone.
One day, little Johnny and little Susan were in bible class. Little Susan had been tired that day, so she kept falling asleep. The teacher said to little Susan, "Who is our Lord and Savior?" Little Johnny poked her in the butt with a push pin, and she yelled, "Jesus Christ!" The teacher goes, "That's right, go back to bed." Then, the next thing the teacher asked was, "Who gave up their son for our sins?" Little Johnny poked her again, and she yelled, "God Almighty!" The teacher says, "That's right, go back to bed." The next question the teacher asked was, "What did Adam say to Eve after their 13th child?" Little Johnny poked her in the butt again. She yelled, "If you stick that thing in me again, I am going to break it in half and shove it up your own ass and see how you like it!"
How do you get a woman to give head? Force it down her throat and hold the back of her head. Make her gag for a little and then pull out. Do this over and over for 30 seconds or so. If she doesn't open up, choke her and force her mouth open.
Woman aren't human anyways... lol.
Why can't orphans become criminals? Because she isn't wanted.
Yo mama so slow, she took nine months to make the joke. Thank god mine only took 6.
Yo mama so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.
So I got my sister shampoo for her birthday, and she stood there and threw her wig on the floor.
Your mama is so ugly, she walked by a TV and missed eight episodes.
Yo mama so fat that when the cashier at KFC asked her what size bucket she wants, she said "the one on the roof."
Yo mama is so ugly, when she tried to join an ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals!"
My aunt worked as a human cannonball.
I'm not sure if she was good at it until she got fired.
How do you know if you have a high sperm count?
She chews before she swallows.
Yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it says, "To be continued."
The other day, my girlfriend asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick.
She still isn't talking to me.
I've been told I've got a perfect cock.
She sure was hard on me when I took it from her, though.
My friend got a sorry excuse for a new hair style, she says "How do you like my new hair style?"
Me: I think it's a great idea, when are you getting one?
A lady asked if I heard about the mass shooting in Ohio. I said yes, my friend died there. She said I’m so sorry. I said yeah, I tried telling him the police had good aim. Worse than that, he just found out his sister was cheating on him.
