She Jokes

Once a woman suspected that her husband was fucking their daughter at night. So she made a plan. That night, she gave her daughter sleeping pills and told her husband that you go to sleep, I have a headache and I will sleep on the sofa in the drawing room today. After everyone slept, she picked up her sleeping daughter and laid her on the sofa and went to her bed and lay down. After an hour, the door of the room opened and one man entered the room and jumped on the bed and fucked her intensely for 2 hours. Then she turned on the light with the bed switch and said, "You definitely didn't expect me." "I definitely didn't expect you, MOM! But you are more delicious than sister"! Her son replied in surprise!

Danielle Smith obviously can't understand a rhetorical question.

Every time you ask her if she can get any dumber, she takes it as a challenge.

Yo momma so delusional, she thought your grandma's Venus flytrap was Audrey II.

Yo mama so Irish that she thought the Chicago Shamrox were a Quadball team.

I'm not saying Danielle Smith shouldn't party with oil barons.

I'm just saying that she should carefully watch her drink if she does.

When a deaf girl master baits, does she use the other hand to moan?

Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?

She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.

Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?

She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.

A man asks God, "Hello God, why did you make my wife so dumb?"

God replies, "So she would love you..."

I tried to rape Amy Winehouse, but she said, "No! No! No!"

So, I was in the woods the other day raping this woman when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!'

I thought, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'

The only thing funnier than the shooting of that healthcare CEO is imagining the look on his wife's face when she got the hospital bill.

Mom: Go clean your room, Little Johnny.

Little Johnny: No, it’s my room.

Mom: Well, it’s my house.

Little Johnny: Then go clean it.

Mom: Go to school!

At school:

Teacher: Hi, Little Johnny. You’re late.

Little Johnny: Watch because my son of a bitch mom told me to clean her room. I told her no, it’s my room, and then she said, 'Well, it’s my house.' Then I said, 'Go clean it,' and then she told me to go to school.

Teacher: Johnny, go to the principal’s office! You just came into school and now you're causing trouble. Go!

Beauty is blind? Ya damn right, 'cause that's what happened when she saw your ass.

She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.

I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.

Must be heartwrenching for a loyal husband to watch his wife dry shagging me on the living room carpet.

I mean, once she started, she couldn't get enough.

Your mom is the biggest tosser on the planet, yeah, you heard right.

I don't have to strain myself a blood vessel and be wankin' solo anymore; she saved me a whole load of arthritis.

The best news about a pretty girl with special needs is that you can get her to do exactly what you want her to do.

I mean, she probably thinks receiving oral is like 100% blood sausage coming right at her.

Your mum's vagina is so ravenous, that last night we both ended up on the living room floor, with her on top. She was eating my creamy young face off.

About to go on a date.

But she was late.

So I got some tape.

And eventually punished her with rape.