Sex jokes

What is the difference between anal sex and a microwave? A microwave doesn't brown your meat.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I only do anal, I thought you knew.

The other day I started watching Game of Thrones.

I told my friend about it. Told him all about the violence, murder, decapitation, gore, sex, gay sex, midget sex, prostitution, rape, paedophilia, incest, and inbreeding... And he was like: "Oh, so you're still on the first episode then?"

Pls send.

My dick's so big, I stuck it in your mom's loose hole.

It's impossible to rape a rapeist because rapeists want sex.

Leave a like if you like sex and porn, and talk to me if you have any questions.

Why did the penis go fly?

Because a girl sucked it too hard, it went flying away.

Clit

So I heard it was important to clean your sex toys, which is why priests invented baptism I guess.

What do you call it when a prostitute pays someone 5 bucks to fuck them?

5 dollar footlongs.

Where did daddy cum in the bed?...

Everywhere!

Getting ready for gangbang.

My mom and dad got home from a party pretty late. Why do I know? Because I was playing Minecraft all night.

Anyways, they get home and start fumbling up the stairs and being really loud. I could have swore I heard them fall down. I assumed they were drunk. I was just playing my Switch when they come into my room. Now I'm about 10 at the time so I watch them get undressed IN MY FUCKING BED! I then just stare at them as they notice me before I witness anything. They say that they were doing "intense kissing" the next morning. I believed that at the time, but now I've been to health class. I now know the truth. I wish I hadn't.

When Kenney goes down on his mom, does he taste vegetable or fish?

When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.

What did the leper say to the hooker? "You can keep the tip."

Why'd I cum all over your mummy's panties? 'Cause she's hot af.

LOLOLOOLOLLOL

Oil and Ass.

Big Phat Wet Ass Orgy 2.

Bubble Butt Bonanza 2.

Big Bubble-Butt Cheerleaders 2.

Big Wet Butts 5.

There Will Be Cum 9.

Mandingo Rocks That Ass.

Big Butts Like It Big 2.

Blowjob Ninjas 5.

Keep It Right There 2.

Big Wet Brazilian Asses! 6

If you’re gonna have a gangbang, make it extreme!