Sex

Sex jokes

Postman

    • Someone walks up to his dad and says, "Dad, what’s the difference between potentiality and reality?" Soo ok, the dad says to the son, "Go ask your mother, sister, and your brother if they’d sleep with the postman for $1,000,000." So the son comes back 5 minutes later and said, "Dad, they all said they would sleep with the postman." So, son, potentially, we have a million dollars, but in reality, we have two sluts and a gay one."

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    • Job

    • Dad's secretary left her position, he told me I could take it if I want it. He also told me the job pays well but there is a lot to catch up on. He kept me under the pump all week.

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    • Makeup

    • I spent 10 hours applying makeup so I could look pretty when I was going to have sex with my partner.

    I needn't have bothered.

    The next day, it was smeared all over my face.

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    • Mate

    • Ol' Mate Shane Warne has sadly passed away. He was probably Australia's Greatest Ever Cricketer. RIP Ol' Mate Warney, died doing what you loved, having gay sex with men and doing cocaine! 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

    Like if you RIP Shane Warne 🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺

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    • Loop

    • If you wait for a woman to get 9 months pregnant and kill her, you will never be able to stop the loop.

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    • Anal Sex

    • You've heard of anal sex.

    You've heard of oral sex.

    You've heard of genital sex.

    But have you ever heard of NASAL SEX?

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    • Wife

    • Teacher: Can someone tell me the only living thing that can reproduce without sex?

    Little Johnny: "Your wife."

    Rape

    • There was an illegal alien woman who wanted to be called "undocumented." So, I had "undocumented" sex with her and threatened to have her deported if she reported me for rape. I'd call it even.

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