Telescope

Telescope jokes

Stalking

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer.

I saw it through my telescope last night.

Fat

You're so fat, astronomers discovered a planet larger than Earth but smaller than Uranus.

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  • Uranus

    Sir William Herschel discovered Uranus in 1781, 200 years before you were born. How did he do that?

    Use

    A telescope has two uses:

    1. To look in space. 2. To see your hairline.

    Momma

    Your momma's so fat, she had to take a selfie using the Hubble telescope.

    Wheel

    The Stephen Hawking space telescope will be launched next year. Apparently, it will have four wheels and run off Windows 7.

    Rapper

    Why did the rapper bring a telescope to the studio?

    To see his FUTURE in the STARS.

    Community

    Well, I found my people. Nerds are underrated. It's like past midnight. I just had my night lunch (yes. it's an actual thing.). I'm about to sleep under the world's largest optical telescope with like 30 other nerds. I'm so fuckin tired, yet my spelling and grammar is mostly intact (I misspelled fucking on purpose). I got less than 5 hours of sleep yesterday and I'll try to get slightly more. I guess this is gn. Unfortunately, the sky hasn't been cooperating too well, but I'm still really enjoying it. There are people from all over the world and the US. It's pretty damn awesome.